Waiting for the Calls

Well it is that time of year again. The time to eat some turkey and my favorite...mashed taters, time to start to think about Christmas to prematurely, and time to remember the worst day of my life, and I am sure the worst day of many other peoples lives.

I honestly do not know why we feel like we have to "celebrate" this date. I know it is not a celebration...it is a remembrance, but I call it that because we should remember Travis any day of the whole year, not the ONE day when he decided to take his life.

It is hard for me to decipher how to handle my day tomorrow, should I live it normally or should I do something in remembrance of Travis. I mean last year I didn't even remember the date was coming up, I had to be reminded, and I was asked to do something specific to remember Travis. I don't know if I wanna do that, but obviously you cannot forget a night like we had.

I can see it now. Phone calls from people who I have not talked to in literately 365 days. I am not sure if I want them of if I am even going to answer. Nothing personal, I mean if you wanna call me, call me any other day of the year. If you even want to call about stuff for Travis do it any other time of the year. I just don't want the "Hey I should probably call and see how things are going since...ya know...this was the day that...ya know...happened" kind of phone calls. Call me because you ACTUALLY want to talk to me.

The One

I kinda like this writing thing. So I am thinking maybe keeping a consistent blog from now on.

Ok so I have been thinking about my life and being single an blah blah blah, people getting married having babies and everything. I even make jokes about wanting a little girl but not wanting to deal with the woman part, (I am joking of course!!!!!!!!) I was thinking to myself. When am I going to find "the One" not some hot chick to date for a while or some nice girl who is fun to hang out with, but "The One" the future Mrs. Lucas Leonardo.

I had this deep conversation with my roomate and we came up with something good. This thing cannoo be rushed. God has a plan for us and he knows when I will find "The One" if there is even a "One". So I need to stop worrying and just put it in his hands because I can guarantee he can find somebody a WHOLE lot better for me than I can.